Mentoring can be a blessing.  It can also go wrong!  It frankly just depends on  the individuals, and how well the process has been thought.  Take a look a this post and you will see.  Note though, that I am a big proponent of mentoring!  It can change lives

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You may know my sentiments about mentoring from past posts in this journal (Do You Need a Mentor? You may Need Two, Black Sales Journal 1/27 and Being a Mentor, Can You Help Someone Else? Black Sales Journal 3/28).  I believe that if your are an accomplished sales professional you probably need to mentor some up and coming neophyte, and if you are new to sales, you probably need a mentor that can help you understand the sales world you are in, as well as understand the organizational politics and dynamics.  That could mean two separate mentors (one with sales knowledge and one with organizational expertise) or one who has a strong understanding of both.

Having been in both of those situations, I do recognize the fact that life can be easier when you have a mentor.  It would be hard for most sales professionals to dispute that mentoring did not help him or her.  Mentoring, is a role, and not a position, and whether it is formal or informal, it can go wrong.

Formalities?

Most sales mentoring relationships are informal.  They happen when a less experienced sales professional gets help from someone who has “been around the block.”  These relationships happen naturally, and because of that, there are very few “agreements” citing what the rules are.

As a matter of fact, it is because they are informal, and there are no basic rules, that animosity and resentment appear when things go wrong.  No one “evaluates” the effectiveness on a formal basis, and termination happens because the utility just might not be there.  Basically, the two parties move “apart” and seldom have the conversation that “this has been good, yet I need to work on my own now”, or “this is not giving me what I need, but I have appreciated your help.”

What Goes Wrong?

There could be a multitude of things that could go wrong, yet there are a few things that make really make a difference:

• Common Elements - The more the mentor and the mentee have in common regarding work styles and ethics, the more compatibility there will be.  Working similar hours and with like intensity can help to develop mutual respect and even admiration, akin to “looking in a mirror”.  Note, when these elements are opposite or have a wide variance, they can be the ‘wedge’ that breaks up the partnership.  The more common the work elements, the more chance there are for a fruitful mentoring relationship.
• Communication – The bond of a mentoring relationship is communication.  Communication styles differ vastly, so an understanding of communication styles and frequency are very important.  Mentors who are not effective communicators can be problematic, as the mentee may never understand fully the gist of the problem and solution, or the gravity of the issue.  The mentee must communicate openly and frequently regarding questions and issues that need clarification.  If neither of these happens, both sales professionals could be in a situation that they are wasting their time.
• Trust and rapport – Since the majority of these relationships happen informally, the parties have usually chosen each other, or one of the parties has proposed the arrangement.  When this goes wrong, it is a short-lived mentoring relationship.   This means that they must trust each other and have a general affinity toward one another.  The trust issue is large in the arena of sales.  Since prospecting activities as well as sales territories are all in play, the mentor must be able to trust the mentee will respect what he or she is doing to help.  The pilfering of a prospect will change everything if it happens, and so it should, as that is a character issue.  Rapport is important as well because it forms linkages that may develop in to stronger bonds.
• Agreement on goals and objectives – Most sales professionals have enough to do in the course of a day or week than to enter into an arrangement without some agreed upon goals and objectives.  Yogi Berra (yeah, I am quoting Yogi Berra) once said “You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.” Know where you are going and have agreement on what will give value to the mentoring relationship and set your sights to get there.  If it is learning how to prospect more effectively then the mentoring activities should be focused there.  If it is becoming accomplished in sales techniques, the focus should go there.  Have a plan in mind, and have the discussions that make it real.

• Agreement on the “end game” – The mentoring arrangement, whether informal or formal will have to end at some point.  It is only right, and gives the mentee an opportunity to help someone who was in the same “boat” as he or she was.  Plan where this terminates as you go along.  Yes, this sounds formal, yet it is more realistic than one of the two parties to the mentoring relationship starting to avoid the other.

When it Goes Right! A Personal Example

As a fledgling sales representative, I searched out another Black sales professional to help me figure out how to get started.  I know that I did not call it mentoring at that time, and neither did he, yet he talked to me about prospecting.  More importantly, he talked to me about prospecting when you are Black in a business world that was not always kind.  In the State of Illinois with over sixty sales professionals of which three were Black (that included me), I needed someone who would help me learn the ropes.

His name was Walter, and he saved me a little time in a lot of my activities by taking that time with me.  I did not always agree with what he said; yet we had rapport and I appreciated him spending that time, as in a world where you don’t get points for spending it helping others, he helped.  Having someone pick up the phone when you had a question is worth its weight in gold.

In truth, you don’t need all of the formalities if the mentoring is informal, but it helps to note the topics and the milestones.

Reach out to others as a veteran and offer to help someone who is in need. Give then a chance to succeed.  If you are a sales professional in need of help, reach out to the veteran’s whom you can learn from, and get some badly needed advice.  Always remember that color is not an issue in mentoring.  Helping someone who has promise is its own reward.  You also learn much about yourself and your own abilities when you help others.

As always, we appreciate you comments.